Aida-S: For the beginning tell us your full name, where are you from and your age.

Samire: My name is Samire, I am from Kosova and I am 15 years old.

Aida-S: Can you tell us how was your life before the war, what was happening, how did you live?

Samire: It was bad, we couldn't do nothing. My father used to work, he saw the police, they let him work. So only my father... (?)... but then, they didn't let him even work, so it was really bad. They kicked him out of his work and everything.

Aida-S: So the life even before the war very bad for you?

Samire: Even before the war, it was really bad. Like nine years ago. It was bad as it was in 1999. But the real war stared in 1998. No, the real war actually started in 1999.

Aida-S: So, did you know that the war was coming or it just came suddenly?

Samire: No, I didn't. It just came, I think it was OK before, but

then it just happened. They were killing people.

Samire: Serbs and Albanians, Kosvars. And they, Serbs, used to kill Albanians, cut their everything, cut them in pieces and to... (?) that kinds, and fire houses, and I don't know, everything. And I was really scared, Everybody was scared. My parents were so worried because we are six children, and they said "What should we do?". And my brother was so small, he got sick. And then we had to leave our house and go to Macedonia, and then when we went there it was better but we were still scared. From there, we went somewhere else because we wanted to get out of there. So we were going to go to live somewhere else because we slept over night in the ground, outside. And hen we wanted to go to my friends, to my father's friend. And then he came to pick us up, but they didn't let us go. And then we went there, we went to a school actually. It was a big school, only for Kosovar people, you know just to come in, cause we didn't have places to go. And there, they gave us everything. But when I left my house, oh my God, I can't even imagine.

Aida-S: And during the war in Kosova, how long have you lived there?

Samire: How long?

Aida-S: How long have you been in Kosova when the war was going on?

Samire: I don't know. I think...

Aida-S: Short time, long time?

Samire: No, it was a long. I was like, I don't know, I was like six.

Aida-S: You were six years old?

Samire: Yeah.

Aida-S: But how long did you live there during the war?

Samire: Oh, it was like one year, two. It ended in 2000. It was like one year.

Aida-S: OK. So, like I told you, the airplanes were going around, dropping the bombs, did the same thing happened to you?

Samire: Yes, there was airplane in the sky every time.

Aida-S: And Serbs had weapons.

Samire: Yeah, yeah, yeah, they were shooting us, killing people and stuff

Aida-S: and what did you do at that time? You tried to escape right?

Samire: Yeah it was really scary

Aida-S: So how did you do that?

Samire: I don't know. My parents - my mom, she didn't actually want to get out of the house, say "I don't wanna go out with six children, I'd rather get killed inside than go out and see my children be killed," you know. So then my father was going outside and we were looking out of the window and we saw all the NATO came, we saw, I don't know, if it wasn't for NATO we would've been killed. A lot of people died but nobody from my family. A lot of people I know died, from other families, happened bad things to them.

Aida-S: You said you saw many people cut in pieces, did you see dead people?

Samire: Only on TV?

Aida-S: Only on TV.

Samire: 'Cause I lived in Pristina and there they didn't do that kind, only did on farms, not in cities, they didn't do nothing in... the place that I lived, Pristina

Aida-S: but they were dropping the bombs

Samire: Yeah, everywhere.

Aida-S: And you stayed in the house all the time?

Samire: Yes, all the time.

Aida-S: That's where you hide.

Samire: My father he couldn't even go out so we didn't even have nothing to eat, so my father was afraid to go out, so then I was-- because they said that we'll kill mans and I don't know, and when I was there I was like thirteen and then me and my cousin she's thirteen too we're going to buy food and stuff because my father couldn't go out, my mom was afraid that he might die, somebody'll just shoot him on the street. And then when they saw us little kids they didn't even say nothing, we just bought some sugar and some stuff that we needed and went back home.

Aida-S: I remember during the war the food was very expensive --the same thing was in Kosova?

Samire: Yes, very expensive. And during the war it got more expensive because they didn't have food it just got so expensive.

Aida-S: You remember when you saw dead people on TV, how did you feel?

Samire: I felt so sad because that might happen to me and my family too, so I was afraid, I was sad, my parents were crying

Aida-S: so then you went to Macedonia, and how long have you been there?

Samire: we stayed there for like three months, actually, two and a half. My cousin he said he could bring us here, and then, his wife is American so she knew everything. When we came here we came three families on the same airplane it was my father's brother my uncle and my father's uncle, we all came on the same airplane, we didn't want to stay in Macedonia, because we thought we're gonna stay there a long time, so we wanted to come here, and when we came here O my god! We just wanted to go back again!

Aida-S: OK I'll talk about that, I just want to go back a little bit to make it clear: how did you get to Macedonia? Who helped you to get there, from Kosovo to Macedonia?

Samire: We went by taxi. We were gonna wait for buses but the buses were all full, we were like six children, we didn't have place, we went by taxi, we saw a taxi and we told him "Can you just take us somewhere, can you just take us out of here?" and they took us. And then we went to a school, that I told you, and then we stayed there, we had food everything. I was so tired, I threw up.

Aida-S: So from Macedonia you came to the United states?

Samire: Yeah.

Aida-S: OK, do you remember the date you came here, or year?

Samire: Yeah, it was May 19, 2000

Aida-S: At the beginning - you started to talk about how it was... now tell me.

Samire: About what?

Aida-S: About how it was at the beginning.

Samire: Yeah, at the beginning it was bad, I don't know, we didn't expect to be like this we thought it was better, but my cousin really helped us because they took three families from Macedonia to bring them here; they had small apartment but we all slept together on floors and everywhere and we had food and everything, but we were still worried about our families there. And after awhile we go used to it, we wants to go back but we didn't, I didn't go back, almost three and a half years I been here.

Aida-S: so when you came here you started to go to school?

Samire: Yeah

Aida-S: How did you learn to live here? What helped you?

Samire: My cousins. They found us an apartment, we came here in may and we couldn't go to school 'cause school was almost finished, we couldn't go to summer school we couldn't go until September, we learned a little English but not that well; when we went to school we learned it all.

Aida-S: How do you feel as a refugee, when somebody asks you are refugee, are you proud of that or are you ashamed?

Samire: I don't know.

Aida-S: Like, if somebody asks me, I wouldn't be ashamed at all, I would say I'm very proud.

Samire: I'm not ashamed either.

Aida-S: No?

Samire: No.

Aida-S: OK. So as a refugee here, what are your biggest concerns about being here? Do you have any concerns?

Samire: Nah.

Aida-S: Not at all?

Samire: No.

Aida-S: OK so you went through the war and you escaped it so what are your thoughts about the war right now?

Samire: I think it was very frighten, I don't even want to think about it, it was so sad.

Aida-S: After September 11, do you feel safe here?

Samire: Not so much, but I feel more safer than I felt in my country.

Aida-S: If you had a chance to talk to someone important in the government, what would you tell him about the war? Like George Bush.

Samire: I would tell him everything that happened, how was it. I saw a guy he didn't want to leave his house but the police came and told him if you don't get out we're gonna kill him, we're gonna shoot you. He said no I don't wanna. So they really did shoot him in his head and his head was bleeding and then he was crying and his family they were carrying him and it was so sad. And the people- small kids were crying they didn't know where their parents were, some of them. Everybody, everybody had to leave their house, we were all in a line, nobody knew where their parents or anybody was; and then we took the train into Macedonia, and nobody wanted us to get in but my father wanted us to get in because we had a small brother, he was only 3 weeks old, and then we were scared he might die or anything, so my father was worried to get him in the train, he said Just take my wife and my kids I don't want to get it, but then Albanians, they're like I don't know, they didn't want us to get in, they just want to be safe with themselves. So there was a wagon and my father just pushed us in and then we all went in, six children, we couldn't sit nowhere in the wagon 'cause it was so small, so we had to sit in the bathroom, it was small bathroom so we had to sit on top of each other. On the toilet!

Aida-S: So how did you feel in that moment? Scared probably?

Samire: Yes, I was scared that they will kill us in the train, and then when we got out of the train they were saying walk slowly because there might be some bombs under the ground and so we were just walking slowly and we slept over there on the big place... a field.

Aida-S: I'm a little confused now because when I asked how you got to Macedonia you said a taxi.

Samire: We took a train from my house, look - everybody had to leave their houses so everybody was walking on the line so there were a lot of people, they didn't let us in Kosovo, they wanted us out of there, they all sent us some to Albania and some to Macedonia. And then we took the train and the train went to Macedonia. And while we were there, there was a field, right? And everyone had to go there and everybody helped us, they brought us blankets to sit and water and everything. And then on the train while we were going there, my brother, he was three weeks old, my mom she didn't know what way he was 'cause she covered him so he won't get cold right? So my mom didn't know that his head was- so she just took his feet and put him upside down and then my mom she thought he was dead, but then later we saw him he was breathing. And then the train we went to the field they gave us everything we slept there for a night, my parents were awake right? So then my father wanted to get out of there, we didn't want to sleep there another night, my father wanted to get out, 'cause he speaks Serbian because in Macedonia they speak Serbian, so my father was telling them, Let me go look my kids are tired. My father's like, Here's money; but they didn't want money or anything so my father was fighting with them. Later they let us go, my father just want to get out of there, and they let us go and while we were going there, they took a photo and then we were in newspaper and they were interviewing us, everybody came and they were asking questions and everything. So later, we went there and then there was buses to take us to different places in Macedonia, but we couldn't go all in the bus because the buses were all full. So we saw a man. He was taxi driver, so he just took us to the school that I said. And then in school, they give us everything. And then, my uncle, he told his friend to come and pick us up, and hen we went to the place to live there. We stayed there like two months, two and a half.

Aida-S: So you said you were in newspapers and they were interviewing you. Do you remember what kind of questions they asked you?

Samire: I don't know. Some of them were in English. And some of them were in Albanian because one was in English; one was in Albanian so they were translating. I don't know, I forgot. In three years, I forgot what they asked us.

Aida-S: Now when you remember the war, what image you have in your head? Like when somebody tells you war, what do you remember, what image you have in your head?

Samire: I have sad and I don't know.

Samire: No. I just think it's sad and everything. I feel bad for those people who died.

Aida-S: Can you tell us what are your plans for future?

Samire: I don't know. My father wants me to get an education here because in my country, even of I get an education it's not nothing. But if I get education here maybe I'll find a job or I don't know. I actually want to be a nurse. I learn good in school, so maybe I could be a nurse when I grow up. I think its better to live here than in my country. Still they have problems, even though the war is over. They still have problems.

Aida-S: Would you like to go to visit your country?

Samire: Yes, I'd love to.

Aida-S: Ishmael, if you have some questions.

Ishmael: I have a couple of questions. When you was explaining about your life before the war I didn't get it, like a picture or something. I want you just to tell us, like how was your life and your family before the war came in Kosova?

Samire: Before the war? It was because my father, he didn't have job, so he was just selling stuff, he was buying and selling stuff. The Serbs didn't even let him sell stuff. They said, "You can't work here". So my father had to afford six kids and his parents, too. He was the only one who worked, you know. So it was bad for 9 years. His job was really nice.

Raeshma: What was his job?

Samire: I don't know how to say it in English. He was like secretary, working with phone or I don't know. Something like that, I don't know ho to say it in English.

Ishmael: Like on reception.

Samire: Maybe.

Ishmael: Then you was like talking about the Serb, the Serb. Can you tell us what happened when the war happened in Kosova, like to tell us why the war was going on in Kosova?

Samire: Why? I don't know why. I think they just wanted our Kosova, I don't know. They waned the place.

Ishmael: Like for example, my own country that I came from, the war was going on because the rebels, they were like the one fighting the government because to be rich, they wanted power and stuff. So then, the rebels against the government, then the form like a group and they call themselves RUF, then they start fighting the government. So I don't know if it's the same thing that happened in Kosova. I want you to tell us a brief story about what happened when the war stared in Kosova.

Samire: Well, I don't know why it started, first of all. I have no idea, but it just started. And I think they just wanted the place because they said, "Get out of here" and they didn't let us work. Even in school they were trying to make it in their language. They wanted everybody to learn their language. But the school was in Albania. And I don't know. I think they just wanted to have a place.

Ishmael: Who were the Serbs?

Samire: Who?

Aida-S: Serbs.

Ishmael: Like you was talking about the Serbs, I don't know who are they. You was talking about them.

Samire: Who are the Serbs? They're Serbs. They're people.

Aida-S: They are just people from country called Serbia. They are Christians.

Samire: Yeah. And we're Muslims.

Ishmael: You said coming here was like bad. Can you be specific and tell us what was bad of coming here?

Samire: Coming here, what was bad? It was bad because we didn't speak English, we didn't know nowhere to go, we didn't know nothing, nothing. And we couldn't find apartment because it's hard to find apartment with six kids. So that was a big problem. Until we found one, it took like two months. Because we couldn't find it, six kids, nobody wanted us.

Ishmael: At that moment, how was you feeling, because I learned that you are the oldest sister? You are like the oldest, then, now you guys leave your own country, your father and mother are here. Then, you said you are sleeping on the floor, staying in the small apartment, So how was you feeling at that moment? Before, you was like carrying that everybody is here in America, it's a great country, you can be rich in a second, you can have money like that. Then you come here, everything was upside down. So, how was you feeling at that moment?

Samire: We were feeling disappointed. But we were just happy that we were out of Kosova. We weren't still in the war. We knew that we were safe. But it was hard because we were three families in the same apartment, and that apartment had only two rooms. And everybody sleep in the same apartment. My cousin was really nice to get us all.

Ishmael: OK. Then, one last question. You said living here is better than in your country. I thought the same way but maybe our opinions are not the same. I think living here is better than in my country because here at least it's safe. Then, you can have a job; you can have money and stuff. So, I don't know what you think. Why you said living here is better than in Kosova.

Samire: I like living here because I know I'm more safe, and for education, and everything.

Aida-S: So, if you go to your country, to Kosova, you wouldn't feel safe there?

Samire: No. Now, maybe a little safe, but not as quite as here.

Aida-S: So right now, you see yourself in the future here, not in your country?

Samire: Yeah.

Ishmael: Even though people are saying the war is finished in Kosova, they are going back, would you and your family like to go back and stay there, or just settle there and stay there for the rest of your life?

Samire: Yeah, I want to go back. But, it's still not safe over there, until few more years it's not gonna be safe, I don't know. It's still not safe.

Aida-S: You miss your family and your friends?

Samire: I miss them so much. I would love just to go there for visit, that's all. Just a week, that's all.

Ishmael: Then, one question that we forgot to ask is how was school for you when you came here? You was not speaking English.

Samire: Oh, my God, it was so hard. 'cause we didn't know what place to go, I was going to wrong classes, I didn't know what they were saying, nothing. And there, when I came first, they forgot to write my name on list and they were asking me what was your name, and I didn't know how to say it in English. They wanted to spell it, and I didn't even know how to spell my name. It was really hard, I didn't know nothing.

Ishmael: Did anybody ever discriminate you in the school because you can't speak English, you are from Kosova, you are from a war country?

Samire: Teachers, they were "Oh, my God, how was there, is everybody safe?" but the kids, some of them, they were like some popular, some unpopular, and they were making fun the way we were speaking English. But now, they don't.

Aida-S: Is there anything you would like to add?

Samire: No.

Ishmael: Do you have any questions for us about our stories, the project we are doing and stuff?

Samire: No.

Raeshma: So Samire, you are the oldest of the six?

Samire: Yeah, of the six children. Real small. And, the smallest is three years old.

Raeshma: So maybe you said it, but I missed it, what's that like being the oldest, especially here? Do you have lots of responsibilities for your brothers ad sisters?

Samire: Yes. They look up to me, so whatever I do they all do, so I have to be extra nice.

Aida-S: Is that a good feeling or bad, hard?

Raeshma: And now your parents speak English?

Samire: My Mom doesn't, only few words, but my father, he speaks better than me, his accent is not that good, but he speaks really nice. He knows those hard words I don't even know. But his accent is not as good as young's because young people catch it faster, the accent. So my Mom doesn't, and all our brothers and sisters are now, it's easier for us to speak English at home than Albanian, so we speak in English. And my Mom goes "Stop speaking English, I can't understand my own children". We tell her "Learn English." She has to learn because she is here now; she has to learn in English. But I still don't wanna forget my language, but we're used to, in school and everywhere, using English. So we're used to speak to each other in English, kids, you know.

Raeshma: So, the little ones that learned English, now, are they almost becoming better in English than in Albanian?

Samire: No. My little brother is eight, he is in this school, sometimes he says in English, and they say "Samire, what does it mean in Albanian?" He forgot so fast, only for three years. Because he speaks English all the time. If my Mom speaks in English with him, he'll all forget. But my Mom, she doesn't speak English, so she has to speak in Albanian. My father, he speaks in Albanian, too, but we say in English, and he says in Albanian. So, my little brother, it's hard for him. He still doesn't know how to speak because it's mixed, Albanian and English. My Mom speaks in Albanian, we speak in English, so he is mixed, he doesn't know what language to learn.

Ishmael: Is your Mom and Dad working here?

Samire: My father works.

Ishmael: Then, how was, like, when you guys were in this apartment, when you guys move out, then I don't know if your father was speaking English when you move out from this apartment?

Samire: No, he didn't.

Ishmael: So how was life at that time that your father had to find a job, have to take responsibilities, like to pay the bills, provide food, and stuff. How was life?

Samire: How was life? It was hard. My father had to find a job, my cousin found a job for him, so he was working and then, he didn't know what the bill is or anything. It was hard, we didn't know what to do, but my cousins helped, because they were here before us. They helped us. They lived near us.

Aida-S: No. Thank you very much.

Ishmael: Thank you so much.

Samire : You're welcome.

Ishmael: We appreciate it.